Spanish Midnight.

I wonder if my publicist would be amenable to a publicity tour in Latvia sometime this Autumn?

I wonder if this greek salad is the most enjoyable salad I've eaten since my last salad?

I don't know if there is enough water in this glass.

I wonder if Judas Priest was the appropriate musical decision after being sequestered in my bedroom quarters, so my selfish roommates can watch a Breaking Bad episode?

Honestly...I'm going to change it.

You don't understand how ashamed I feel at this moment in time. I am letting down 40+ years of the best heavy metal known to mankind.

I'll listen to Jackie by Sinead O'Connor. This is pretty ridiculously damn heavy in it's own way.

I've been on mostly a juice/salad diet for the past 6 days I think.

Two or three servings of juice per day.

Lots of water as well.

Freshly made juices with apples, cucumbers, red onion, celery, cabbage, beets, swiss chard, kale, oranges, ginger, lemon, carrots, tomatoes, and probably some other vegetables I'm forgetting.

I was sitting comfortably at my desk this afternoon when I sharted.

Of course I didn't know at first.

I knew when I stood up and felt the wetness seep through my buttocks.

You live you learn.

Hustled my ass to the bathroom and finished the shart.

Cleaned up.

Dried off.

Sat in my room in a clean pair of boxers for about 15 minutes before I had to quickly put my shorts on and get to the bathroom.

Brought my own roll of toilet paper this time as we were getting low.

"Ran down and the lady said it
It got torn down
And the priest just said it
It got burned
They give me five years, five years
It's my turn"

Well that's it for Sinead.

Anyway I've dropped 12 pounds in the last 6 days of this dietary adjustment.

I don't own a scale.

I purposely deceived you for the purpose of my enjoyment.

I am sorry.

Can you believe it's almost September?

Let's not discuss that as the end of summer is a very painful, depressing episode I endure each and every passing of the year.

Besides the Cubs and family and friends and the Bears and the pretty obvious coolness of Chicago, I should probably be somewhere else.

I have to ask myself where does the world need Dave most?

It's a difficult question, but I have to believe there is an answer.

Sucks that it's not an Obama rodeo clown, but that guy already took care of that.

I have to pee. BRB.

IABFBRB.

Who's up for a bit of T-Rex?

All of you, that's who!

And, if you're not, I'm sorry for your misinformed existence.

The end.

Bachelor Party Shenanigans Extravaganza!

We all made it out alive, so that's positive. Nothing else really needs to be said. 

Kind of low res files since there were so many of them. Click on the first one (after the movies) and they enlarge into a very convenient slideshow format. Enjoy.