1. Punk Music
I just don't get it. Oh sure, I'll admit they have more musical talent than I do, but so does that step stool over there, so I'm not sure if that counts for anything. And no need to bother me with all those punk bands who are really good and you're sure I'll like them if I just check out. I'm 46 years old. They're not good or I would have figured that out by now. Also, I am currently listening to the Smoking Popes. They utilize guitar solos and interesting music. They're not punk.
2. Bright Sunshine Ricocheting Off White Snow Directly Into My Eyes
I'm not interested in being blinded every time I look around during sunny winter days. That doesn't mean I'd prefer cloudy winter days, I don't, but it does mean I like being able to see without sharp pain coursing through my forehead. And yes, I know sunglasses help, but whatever, these are things I don't like, so save it for the comments.
3. Just About Anything Which Instantly Blows Up Social Media
I'm talking to you Tiger King fans.
4. Stopping To Think About What I'm Currently Writing.
Talk about the worst kind of interruption when trying to write a decent sentence or two. I never liked proofreading so the idea of having to go back and proof everything is anathema to anything and everything I believe in when it comes to writing. I guess that's something I could change if I chose to do so.
5. Listening To Someone Drone On And On About Not Believing Me For This Or That
This one really does get under my skin. I say a lot of stupid shit so I understand these sort of things, but it still annoys me to no end. Jennifer has a cabinet in her dining room with the usual things people might display in a dining room cabinet. For years now, she has accused me rather vehemently that from time to time I go upstairs and I rearrange these items. I don't know where she got this from and I certainly don't know why she thinks I might stoop to such a low humor denominator, but she does. This is something that I never did. At least not for the first few years she accused me of it. Now that's just one example and this one no longer bothers me as much because I'm so used to it I chuckle at its ridiculousness. I wish I could say the same for all the other instances.
6. Needing To Listen To Music But Having To Keep The Volume Down
There are times when I understand this must be the case, but that doesn't mean I have to like it. I spent more than a few moments of my youth and most probably my adult life being fascinated by the idea of the whole city of Chicago having to listen to whatever it was I wanted to play for them. A loudspeaker for all the city to hear whenever they were out and about in public. It'd be great as I wouldn't always need to bother with headphones nearly as often. And let's be honest with each other, within a few weeks, I would be deified as some sort of musical God. On the very rare chance I needed to placate a citizen, I would randomly ask strangers if they would be interested in playing a song for everyone else to hear. And sure, most of the time I'd end up rolling my eyes, letting out a brief chuckle and going about my day, but on even rarer circumstances they might do well and I would play their song for them. What a lucky day that would be!
7. Having To Track Down Something I've Lost
I know this is something most people probably dislike, but it's just so damn annoying. I bet there are aholes out there who can't find their keys and then turn it into some fun hunting exercise. Utilizing their Mensa powers to backtrack to where they may have been when they were lost. Giving themselves a reward when said keys are located. Skipping out to the driveway and hopping into their sensible vehicle and driving off to the rest of their day.
8. Hard Cover Books. Fiction Or Non-Fiction.
I don't care how much I would like to read the book, I won't be reading it until there is a paperback version. I just don't care for how much effort is needed to handle books with hardcovers. I don't want a workout, I just want to read something. And I sure as hell don't need to be dealing with this stupid dust jacket. What the hell does a book need a jacket for? Is it too cold in here? Jacket or no jacket, the book will eventually be coated in dust.
9. Donald J. Trump
This one is obvious I know, but...it's second to last on this list for a reason. This person is so morally reprehensible that he has severely impacted my opinion of those who support him. I know you're all good people. I only know good people for the most part, and since you're a friend, than you're good. Prone to being conned by a two-bit moron, absolutely! But good nonetheless!
10. Wondering If That Spaghetti Dinner I just Shared With My Three Brothers Might Be One Of The Last Dinners We Share
I came up with number nine on this list long before I had most of the other numbers figured out. I knew well enough to just put the number ten before it, but then I went upstairs and ate dinner with my brothers. We social distanced to probably not enough extent, but we chatted for a good long while about whatever it is we felt like chatting about. It was nice. It's always been nice to do this, but when you're unsure whether or not you'll be here or they'll be here a month from now, it's quite a bit nicer. The same sentiment applies to my sisters and cousins and aunts and uncles and friends and coworkers and the guy selling Streetwise down the block and neighbors you've known for 43 years and the neighbors you don't really know but you see them often enough to stop and say a word or two and Slav and Han who work at the Walgreens at the end of the block and the nice folks at the post office on Lawrence and all the random folks I used to see on my commute to and from work and the friends that I don't see any longer who were once a much more important presence in my life (and hopefully theirs as well) and the fine folks at the Salvation Army on Union street and that person that probably just walked by my house and the workers across the alley at the tire shop and the people who work at the Subway on Lawrence who are awfully slow but who make my sandwiches exactly how I want them and whoever those folks were who were in that model airplane club that Dan and I used to go to back when I was in grade school and Judas Priest's Ian Hill who I met in the parking garage with Dan after a show and ex-girlfriends I suppose and Bowser and Flame and Pookie and that conversation with Dan and Mark and Hillary and Michael which we just shared when I went downstairs to get my laundry from the dryer.
This is something I dislike very much. I'll gladly deal with the first nine for the rest of my life if I don't have to worry about number ten.
And speaking of ten, I love you all 10!
Some of you may understand that sentence.
